Way cooler than a ‘sexy Care Bear’ costume.

..or whatever else the corporate hacks are peddling to us these days. There’s a seemingly endless parade of ‘sexy’ Halloween costumes marketed to women – sexy fishmonger! sexy polar bear! sexy beekeeper! sexy sexbot!

Which isn’t to say that there’s anything wrong with sexy Halloween costumes. There isn’t; I’m just annoyed by the uninspired, gender-normative (i.e. you’ll probably never see any ads for a ‘sexy’ Charlie Chaplin costume) selections fobbed off on women around Halloween.

This is cooler!

Plenty of the costume ideas are also hotter than any of the interchangeable “Sexy ___” selections in stores.

Josephine Baker  (costume looks simple enough, though one might have trouble finding the leopard.):

 

Some of the costume ideas almost tempt me to dress up for Halloween this year, something I never really got to do as a child.

All we ‘have to do is fuck’?

Gee, someone should’ve told me this back when I was jobless & hungry. According to this, if I’d only had a baby, it would’ve yielded benefits such as fast food meals, liquor binges, & manicures!

Nope, I wouldn’t have simply had the baby taken from me by CPS (which is what usually happens to homeless moms) at all.

Poverty’s always the most amusing to people who don’t have to experience it.

“a safer watering hole”

Because I value your time more than Scott Adams apparently does, here is a short summary of this article (and, by extension, basically every MRA screed ever penned) to spare you the tedium.:

Rape accusations are overblown, but men are genetically-programmed to be testosterone-crazed, butt-humping fuckbots. However, all these shrill, castrating feminazis are meanies for castigating men as testosterone-crazed, butt-humping fuckbots. Also, chicks only like hugs, not fucking. Fucking is for testosterone-crazed, butt-humping fuckbots.

(These statements may then be followed with garbled arguments resembling the ‘Evolutionary Psychology 101’ class notes of a lonely, sexually-frustrated male undergrad. Insert clumsy metaphor about apex predators and cute little herbivorous prey here.)

Fin